You may not want to believe me but I am a prisoner here. This is captivity.
I'm not free to do anything.
To come in to this with anything other than pure compassion or, better yet, rescue of some kind, is acceptance of my condition. So then I'm confronted with someone who accepts my circumstances and is seemingly happy about them. So then my heart darkens and I hate. I hate more every day. This is not something I choose to feel. It is honest and the only possible way for me to feel. my other choices are oblivion, drugs or death or some kind of mindlessness and emotionlessness. And in to that come all these happy happy people. So then I get to disappoint them and deal with that, or play along and deal with the hypocrisy of that. Either stand with me or get out of the way, and by that I don't mean hide behind the trees and giggle.

put here 11:56 PM

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